Are you dating a salesperson? Bet it’s been quite interesting, huh. The traits of the salesperson are quite unique. Back to this in a second.
While navigating in the dating world, virtual and real-life, we come across people of all ethnicities, life stations, experiences, and of course, doing different things to put bread on the table, & of course, go on dates & paying for the meals, as gentlemen should do…
We have probably met doctors who are particularly concerned about our health, preachers who talks about the moral way of life, engineers who wants to approach the date systematically, business-owners who sometimes end up being more interested to talk about their business ventures, and of course, the salesperson.
The salesperson is an interesting breed, especially when you are dating one, or looking to date one. They are not terrible people, God bless their hearts! In fact every single one of us are weird in some ways. It’s just that this breed of singles have some peculiar traits about them, and what better way to date one, than to do our due diligence in researching about them first? Well… that’s how you stumbled across this particular article, right?
Trait #1. They Travel Too Much!
This is what they’re paid top dollars to do: to expand the company’s market reach. They are travelling billboards per se. They will need to do their rounds per se, to their existing clients, referrals, warm leads, cold leads, new markets, etc. And the age-old way of selling face-to-face is still one of the most effective in gaining & maintaining long-term clients.
It means this become a challenge in keeping in touch while the salesperson is travelling? Honestly, with the advent of the internet since the 1990s, one has to realize there are so many ways to keep in touch –Skype, Whatsapp, Google Plus, Facebook Messenger, etc. It will be truly a lame excuse not to be able to send a “Good morning / night, sweetie!” text daily, right? So yes, their job requires it that they do travel, but it does bring a certain amount of falling in love all over, when you are apart for a week or two, and reuniting and catching up. And so they say, absence does make the heart grow fonder. Try it out.
Trait #2. Can’t Stop Talking about Work!
If we do love someone, and interested to spending the rest of our lives with them, having them being so readily open & excited to share with us about aspects of their lives, doesn’t that give us a deep dive into how they are as professionals, and also as a human being? It is not the Dating CV type run-down of their characteristics & pet peeves, but an actual observation through their stories, their sharing. In fact, is not that what we signed up for in dating – to have another person trust us sufficiently to share their lives with us?
Yes they do talk about their targets, their achievements, maybe some office politics and challenges. These are all signals of trusting you, of wanting to seek your understanding of who they are and what makes them tick. So next time they talk about their work, listen, take mental notes about what is important to them. Then in the next conversation, try following-up with them on that matter. See how that little act brings you to the next level with them.
Trait #3. They Jive Well with Type A Personalities!
Typically, birds of a feather flock together. Old school, but very true. Those of us who are straight-talkers tend to be less patient with those who are overtly relational and outlandish (rings a bell for any names?), and also those who takes a long time and takes a very roundabout approach to sharing the key point (while we twiddle thumbs). We prefer to A to be A, rather than sprucing it up to look any better than it is. Salespersons tend to be categorized as Type A personalities who are task-oriented, go-getters, goal-oriented, the “Ready? Fire!” sort of person. Whatever happened to the aim? Well, the aiming goes so fast, that you don’t realized they’ve aimed!
Tending to attract the same personality types does not mean it can bode well for them. In fact, personality analysis near & far has concurred that couples with complementary personalities work out to be the best combinations. This means to say, sorry, Type A personalities, you may not make the best partners for another Type A! That being said, noticed “may not”? Studies & research statistics are just indications of the average trends, there are of course Type A partnerships that have worked out fabulously too! The caveat is: they need to take lead roles at different times, respectfully. So in some sense, they are still taking complementary roles, deliberately, to keep the harmony in the relationship.
Trait #4. They Network A.L.O.T.!
As partners of salespeople, other than the travelling, there is also this key activity they are involved in constantly: NETWORKING. For some of us who do not need to be on the forefront of a business, it does not make a lot of sense. However, it is a vitally critical aspect of the salesperson’s job description, and in fact, a required skill-set to succeed. They need to meet people, to connect sufficiently, to understand needs, then to pitch their services and products to the potential client. That means, a lot of time is required in rapport building, and of course, networking over big events, small events, intimate dinners, drinks, clubs, golf, etc.
That being said, as a partner, SECURITY & TRUST plays a huge part in keeping yourself sane when he/she has to spend more time with a particular client. It is no secret, that jealousy plays up a lot when we are do not trust our partners. However, it is likely more so that we are insecured of where we stand in the relationship. The question begs perhaps, of looking at ourselves, and asking ourselves why are we, perhaps, feeling insecured about our relationship? Aren’t we good enough for them? Aren’t we loving them the best we know how to?
If your answers are yes, and yet, you can’t trust them, then perhaps have a chat with them about turning up for some of these events as their partners, to put your status “out there” per se. Or if they are reputable cheaters, and is causing you pain and mistrust, then, perhaps, it is time to move on. However, if they are regular folks who are giving their best at their jobs, and engaging with the clients in a professional manner, then perhaps they would require a little more trust from you.
Trait #5. They are Adrenalin Junkies!
Some of us go for crazy skydives, and bungee jumps for adrenalin pumps. That is basically categorized as our personal preferences for fun stuff. Salespeople may or may not pick up these sports, though many do due to the adrenalin factor, but a typical salesperson is somewhat an adrenalin junkie! They thrive on challenges, the tougher the challenge, the better! They rise with the headwind! They fight better when the opponent is totally nailing their punches!
Eventually coming to taking care & loving a Type A personality is not that difficult once you get the groove of it all. All of us have our mountain-tops and our valleys. After a mountain-top experience, there will need to be a recovery period. As eventual partners of a salesperson, do look to making their recovery period totally refreshing. In some sense, dating and eventually being in a long-term relationship with a salesperson will require some amount of love in action by taking care of them when they come back from battles. If you find that this expression of love energizes you – tending to the needs of the warrior who came home after a victory, and going out again soon for another battle – then most likely you will find this relationship rewarding.
For some, this seems to be somewhat of an imbalance in the relationship – where it seems that the salesperson is getting all the attention. Truth to be told, is there ever any total balance in any relationships? There are certainly rewards of fun, love, & excitement, empathy, inspiration, being with a Type A personality (probably that would be for another blog). However, it is up to us individually how you want to define what makes a good relationship, and what exactly fills our cups. After all, no one is stipulating we have to love a Type A right?
Ball is in Your Court!
The thing about falling in love is that we need to stop falling and start walking into relationships with both our eyes opened! Sure! We can fall head over heels when we’re dating, but to step into a serious relationship that will impact your heart and soul? BOTH EYES OPENED please! Likened to sinking money into any investments, we do our due diligence. And you have done well, friend, by taking the first step to due diligence – researching to seek to understand the Romeo / Juliet who seemed to have caused your heart to skip a beat, and short-of-breath somehow.
So now, is the whole package of how he/she is like, acceptable to your pumping heart, for at least in the longer-term future of your life?